When a person's spouse informs them that their marriage is ending because they have discovered someone else, it is one of the most shocking and scary statements they may get.
Normally, my blog entries are directed at men in an attempt to "wake them up" to the importance of being the type of husband who knows how to guide his wife into a happy, sexual relationship before she runs off with another man and divorces him.
Today, though, I have to speak with wives...
I'm sure this may raise some eyebrows...but I'm just saying...if you care about your marriage, now is a good opportunity to go over some basics before it's too late. "Calle, my husband just told me that he's had enough of being unhappy with me, that he's in love with another lady, that he's leaving me, and that I'll be getting divorce papers in the next day or two." I couldn't say anything since I was so stunned and shocked. I'm still attempting to grasp and realise the gravity of the situation. After all these years of marriage, I can't believe it. I can't believe that after all these years of marriage and raising our children, he's going to abandon us and abandon everything.
I thought our marriage was wonderful, and I believed he was content to be married to me. Why would he do such a thing to me and our kids? What type of slacker, whore, or tramp would ruin our home? What kind of woman would steal my husband away from my children and me? I am not a supermodel, but I am regarded as a beautiful woman. Is this other woman more attractive than I am? Is her physique more attractive than mine? Is she well-off financially? What is it about her that has drew my husband away from me and toward her? I'm not sure what you're talking about. I've poured my entire adult life...everything I have into this marriage. So, what exactly happened to me?
- Wife with a Broken Heart"
Although there are always exceptions, after dealing with far too many women in this scenario, here are seven "common, normal reasons" why a husband would do this to his wife and children:
1. His wife's sexual desire, passion, or interest is insufficient. She believes that if she isn't in the mood, he should be as well. If she isn't in the mood, she believes he is a sex addict and pervert just for being in the mood. And, of course, with this attitude, she is rarely in a good mood since she isn't interested in allowing herself to be in a good mood...
2. His wife regards him as the LAST and LAST person in her life. She prioritises the children's needs. Her mother and sisters come in second and third, respectively. Her friends and coworkers come in third...and after all of that, she is simply "too exhausted" to devote any time, energy, or interest to her spouse.
3. His wife's attitude is often that her father or another man is the world's smartest, wisest man...and he is the world's stupidest, most ignorant man. If he says anything, it will be foolish. It's smart if her father or another man says the same thing.
4. His wife considers the children to be her "property," "property" over which she has complete control. Typically, this means that the children are free to do whatever they want, whenever they want. Typically, this entails his children being pushed into a variety of activities and engagements that his wife believes they should be a part of...
5. His wife expects a lot from him but offers him as little as she can...and then complains about what she does give him. His wife wants him to provide for all of her material needs...but his aren't vital or necessary.
6. His wife claims that she requires all of the money they have right now, but bemoans the fact that no money is being laid aside for the future, and implies that he is a failure for not having more.
7. His wife does not respect, esteem, or appreciate him.
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